does it really matter?

During high school, I had a bit of a reputation for being "scary." When I walked from class to class, people got out of my way. I didn't smile. Football players were known to shutter as I passed.

Even as an adult, I've been told before that I can come across as cold, harsh and rigid. I've been told that my view on life can be off-putting. And I've been told that others would want to get on my "bad side."

All of these things make me laugh.

Truth be told, once you get to know me, I am nothing like that. But, I will admit that I do my best to give that first impression. I guess I figure if you can get past the worst parts of my personality, then you are worth investing time in. I don't waste time with shallow friendships. They aren't worth it to me. I would rather focus my energy and attention on the people who are truly important. There is a lot less drama that way.

As I have grown, I have begun to take this same approach to all aspects of my life. I try to focus on what's important, the things that are going to have a true and lasting effect on me and my family and I try to let everything else just be.

I've learned that stressing and complaining about something does not do anything to help your situation. If anything, it only makes it more unbearable.

• Everything in your house breaks in the same week? Either fix it or don't. Complaining won't fix anything.
• You have no car for three weeks because the body shop is holding it hostage? Either deal with it or lay into them to get them moving. Having a freak out because they are not working on "your schedule" does nothing but raise your blood pressure.
• The kids are so off the wall that you might actually punch a wall? Find a way to engage them, embrace the chaos or get some earplugs and ignore it. Yelling at them to "quit it", only creates more noise and disruption, while getting you worked up into a frenzy.
• Can't stand where you are right now, in this very moment? Then change it. Don't expect someone to do it for you. Copping an attitude will do nothing but bring you, and everyone around you, down.

It's your life. Live it how you want.

But when you've had enough, step back and ask yourself, "Does it really matter? Is anyone dying, bleeding or about to lose a limb? Is this something we can fix?"

Then once you've assessed the situation, look to yourself and ask, "Is my temper tantrum productive?"

Chances are, it's not. And letting it go, might just change your whole perspective ...