I'm not sure if I appeared agitated or if she was really just wondering, but this morning as I ran for an hour on the treadmill, Doodle said, "Mom, would you rather us be at school today? Or do you want us home with you?"
I didn't have to think about the answer.
"Of course, I'd prefer it if you were home with me, Doodle. I always prefer when you are home."
And I was being 100% honest. In fact, I can't remember a time when I really wanted to be away from them. Sure, there are those moments when I think that I cannot take another second of their attitudes, behavior or overall loudness. But, when that happens, I want 10 minutes to regroup, nothing more.
I miss them when they're out of the house. The thought of experiencing anything in this life without them pains me. I want to see all their moments. I want to see the excitement in their eyes over the things I've come to find mundane. I want to watch that lightbulb flick on when they discover something new. I want to be there, not to catch them when they fall, but to help them stand back up again.
It's so easy to get caught up in life. All the rushing around, multitasking and stressing can take away your ability to really capture those moments. I know I'm guilty of it. I do eight things at once never giving my full attention to any. But then something happens to bring you back to reality. Something that makes you remember how our moments are finite. And how you should relish in every single one you get.
So, yes Doodle, I always want you home with me. I want nothing more.