Monday, January 30, 2012

getting back on the saddle ...

The last time I rode a bike outdoors, I finished the ride looking like this ...

yeah, that's a complete AC Separation
and this ...

Road rash from Hell
and this ...


It wasn't pretty.

After my injury and subsequent surgery, it took me a while to get to where I really believed I was ever going to ride on the road again. Plus, my trainer is really comfy. Why would I want to leave comfy? Oh, and then there were my million and one excuses.

At first, I couldn't ride outside. My arm didn't have enough mobility to safely steer and balance the bike.

Then, I just got scared. It was probably better for me to wait.
 
And then, winter rolled around and it got too cold out to ride. Oh, well.

But this weekend, that all changed. I knew I had to start riding outside. My arm was functioning. The weather was gorgeous. All that was left was my fear. And I was going to have to get over it.

I know it may seem silly, but this was a big deal for me. Crashing scares me. Cars scare me. My clipless pedals that I had yet to use scared me. My new wicked fast bike, TigerBlood scares me. There was a whole lot of fear going on.

Fear that I conquered. Mostly.

I still fear cars.
And crashing.
And the speed that I can produce on my wicked fast bike.
But, I already got that "everyone falls while unclipping" thing out of the way. So, I really came out ahead.

After Saturday's ride, I'm less scared. And I know it will get better.

And if it doesn't, I will just ride really slowly on race day.

22 comments:

bobbi said...

I was scared FOR you - GOOD FOR YOU for getting out there despite your fear!!

RunHapi13 said...

I get it T...really I do. But Iam glad to see you working it out with yourself. Just take your time, it will come.

ltlindian said...

I too, am totally scared to ride my bike on the roads. The roads around here have no breakdown lane and they are narrow and windy (like lots of turns, not air blowing. long I not short I) and people drive like jackasses. So all my bike training is on the spin bike and I have only ridden my bike twice. Once for a race and the other to figure out the clips. I need to get over that. Oh, and my OWS fear too. Shit. This oly tri in August is really going to be tough...

Erica said...

That picture of you is so sad :( I am scared to death of my clip less pedals I have only been out on my bike once......must conquer you did fantastic!

Marlene said...

Sooo proud of you!

(Just) Trying is for Little Girls said...

Way to get it over with. And, I heard about that unclipping falling thing from S. Glad you got it out of the way.

Elisabeth said...

Way to get back out there! I had a bad crash on my road bike a week before Christmas and wound up in the hospital with a concussion. My coach made me get back on the road about a week later (thankfully I was able to). I'm a little less nervous with every ride back out there. And, even if you start slow, every ride will get a little easier. I'm still trying to relax when I'm on the bike, but I know it will come with time. But, really, every ride feels a little less scary than the previous one (and I'm still scared of cars and falling, but I have to keep going and conquer these fears).

Lauren {sweat junkie} said...

I put clipless pedals on my bike about a month ago and so far all of my rides have been on the trainer since it's winter. I'm definitely scared to death about my inevitable fall.

Way to face your fears and be tough :)

Running Backwards in High Heels said...

I don't blame you for being scared! I would be too. But you rock and falling sucks. Chances are, you will fall again, but I highly doubt it will hurt as bad as the first time.

Shellyrm ~ just a country runner said...

Really really happy that you got back out there. No doubt you would but I can only imagine how hard it was to face it. Great job showing yourself and all of us that fears are to be overcome!

Julie D. said...

way to get back out there!! great example for all of us!! go get'em, Tonia!

Robin said...

The hardest part is getting back out there ... now it's all down hill from here! Way to go. www.dashingdiva.net

TNTcoach Ken said...

I like comfy, now where is my trainer?????

Running Ricig said...

Yay! Awesome job. Even with no injury, I feel that way about the treadmill sometimes. It's so comfy, why leave?

Amanda - TooTallFritz said...

Just had the "everyone crashes" conversation with a chick today. Cheers to wishing all of "us" a year of soft falls with few witnesses! Let's make it happen!

ajh said...

Good for you for facing your fear. You had reason to be scared after that fall and after math.

Colleen said...

Oh sweetie... it will totally get better! I know the fear I had after crashing my bike in August. That first ride was the scariest thing I've ever done probably. I noticed every rock, shadow, lip, etc. in the road. The next ride was better. And so on. You are strong... you'll get comfortable.

Aimee said...

Woohoo! Way to get out there and conquer your fear! I know it can be a little scary out there on a bike, but every time you get out there, it gets better!!

Jason said...

Way to get back out there. I need to direct Karen to this post because she is still afraid to get back on her bike after last year's crash as well.

And yes everybody falls when unclipping. I do it at least once a year. Stupid pedals!

Yo Momma Runs said...

Sometimes the mental recovery is even harder than the physical, and we don't talk about it as much. Great job conquering some fears and keeping it real.

5 Miles Past Empty said...

You just gotta get back on....I got on a week post-race-of course I didnt have the break you did but I had a broken tailbone ad concussion. I'm still scare to completely let loose down a hill. I ride the breaks on all downhills....maybe someday I'll get over it but once you see your life flash before you in a bike crash like that it is HARD not to have a healthy fear and respect for the ride. But you will be just fine and the wisdom that comes with crashing, and surviving, will guide you!!! =)

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