Lately, I haven't been feeling the run.
I will happily swim and bike all day, but when run comes knocking on my door, I look for a place to hide, hoping he won't realize that I'm at home.
And the thing is, I know exactly why.
- I've cut my weekly mileage in half from last fall. For me, running less has made me feel like less of a runner. I doubt my speed. I doubt my endurance. I know I shouldn't question either of these things, but I do. I'm human. It happens.
- My run group has become wicked fast. Last fall, when we were all marathon training, we were all similarly paced. During my hiatus from the group during 70.3 training, everyone drank rocket fuel and took off. Their easy pace is almost my race pace and I feel like I'm sucking wind every time I run with them. It's rather defeating.
- I'm kind of in love with being a triathlete. I want to swim and bike and strength train, in addition to my running. And the only way to fit that all in is to run less than I am accustomed to. My goals are changing, which is fine. I'm just having a hard time keeping that in mind when I'm in my peer group.
With that said, eventually, I give in and lace up my sneakers, but I can't seem to find my "Run Love." Instead, I am filled with "Run Tolerance" just counting down the minutes and miles until I am done.
And although, I quite enjoyed joining my sister, Beans, for her first four miler ever this weekend, my missing run mojo does not bode well for Saturday, when I am scheduled to run the Blue Ridge Half Marathon.
|Four miles done. So proud of her.
13.1 miles of hills. 2500+ ft of elevation change. And one monster climb over the first 4 miles of the race.
An insanity that I have not prepared for.
Over the last five months, I have done nothing but focus on Ironman 70.3 Texas, which was pancake flat. I don't even remember the last time I looked at a hill, nevertheless ran one. Perhaps I am setting myself up for failure. Or maybe, just maybe, this race will be so absurd that it can't help but re-inspire my running mojo.
I'm not really sure.
But either way, I'm going to keep putting one foot in front of the other until I find my "Run Love" again. I know it's out there. Somewhere ...