Friday, June 17, 2011

last time ...

When my father passed away, everyone was at home. Odd, considering that both my younger sister and I were in college at the time. In fact, it happened right before summer - the first summer I wasn't going to be living at home. But, in some twist of fate, the previous tenants of the apartment I was renting couldn't be out by their move date, so they split the month with me. They stayed in the apartment and I went home (since I still had that ability).

With that, my two roommates and I headed to my parent's house for a few days. And on the second day of our visit, it happened. My father unexpectantly passed of a cardiac event in his sleep.

I don't think this is coincidence. I was supposed to be there. I was supposed to be the one making those dreaded calls to our family members. Not the one receiving it.

From that moment on, I have never questioned fate. I have never left angry. And I have never ended an interaction with the people I love, whether over the phone or face-to-face, without saying, "I love you." It's too important not to. I want the people who matter to me to know that they matter to me. Because if nothing else, you never know if it is the last time you will get the chance to tell them.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because we're closing a chapter in our lives. Maybe it's because someone else is. Maybe it's because I crashed my bike and it could have ended so much worse. Maybe I just needed a reminder. Who knows?

The reason doesn't really matter. All that matters is that the message is clear ...

21 comments:

MomRunningFromCancer said...

Enjoy every moment!

Nicole Orriëns said...

I got goosebumps reading this. How beautiful that you were home, and fate led you there.

momshomerun.blogspot.com

cql said...

Life is short, make it count

Rachel McPhillips said...

You are so right. Thanks for that reminder!

Running Ricig said...

wow, thanks for this post. You're right.

Molly said...

I know what you mean. My husband lost a dear friend to cancer this week, she leaves behind two little girls. I keep thinking of her, and how we need to appreciate every single moment.

Jenn said...

Well said TMB! Thanks for this important reminder. Life is precious.

momof3 @ Neurosis of the Stay at Home Marathoner said...

word.

Mel -Tall Mom on the Run said...

HUGS!! Miss you friend!! TEXT ME!!

jamie@sweatyhugs said...

Same thing happened to my father TMB. The message is LOUD and CLEAR! Hugs to you...

Olivia's Mommy said...

And I'm sure you've made him proud by turning the experience into a beautiful message that you're passing on to others

Zoë said...

I couldn't agree more. Hugs TMB!

Marlene said...

Here here!

MCM Mama said...

(((HUGS))) Thanks for the reminder!

Shellyrm ~ just a country runner said...

I spent the last night of my father's life with him. It was not a coincidence. It was an opportunity. One I am thankful for still today. With Father's day this Sunday, I am quick to tear up just thinking about the person he was who I miss everyday. But I am so glad that I had him in my life and I took opportunities to share, listen, and learn with/from him when I did.
Thanks for the reminder.

5 Miles 2 Empty said...

Thanks for sharing this T. I certainly dread this feeling hate the thought of truly being able to understand what you are feeling. And I dread the day that I may get that call. I know you know my dad has cancer and he fights it every day and I am so far away, not there. It hurts so bad to know I am missing so much...I'll be going home to OK tomorrow and I can't wait to give him a huge hug.

Mustang Sally said...

Kind of cool that we talked about "Dads" when we ran the other morning....and strangely I've thought about your experience..and mine...with their deaths a lot this week..perhaps preceding Father's Day..or perhaps because the conversation moved me...that you shared yet you barely know me. I have more to say but will share in person...but I loved this post.

Aimee said...

Thank you for the reminder...love this!

Pam said...

This made me sniffle. I'm happy to say that I JUST got off the phone with my Dad (he called on his way home from work. just because), and the last thing we said to each other was, "Love you, babe." "Love you too, Daddy."

Wifey said...

What a wonderful outlook on life. Thanks for sharing.

Winks & Smiles,
Wifey

TNTcoach Ken said...

That's a wonderful reminder...... Thanks